i hit my coworkers shoulder lightly and he was like “you’re going to make me cry like a girl” and i was like “what’s wrong with being a girl?” and he was quiet for a moment then he looked into the distance and whispered “the social standards they’re forced to live by”
no he didn’t quit lyin
Now that I’m an adult I have to make more serious posts
*steals ur girl* *mom finds out and makes me return her and apologize*
I learned that people can easily forget that others are human.
Nicole Richie talking with her dad after teaching her how to parallel park.
Animal fun fact: Chinchillas can’t get wet. Their fur retains too much water and will start to grow mold. So they bathe by rolling around in dust.
Chinchilla fun fact: Chinchillas have around 20 hairs per follicle; unlike humans who have 2-3 hairs per follicle. Because their fur is so dense, they cannot get fleas or other parasites. The bugs will suffocate in their fur.
Chinchilla fun fact: Petting one of those awesome little guys feels like touching a motherfucking cloud.
Chinchilla fun fact: Their newborn babies are like little pieces of fluffy popcorn. You could easily just toss a handful in your mouth.
Chinchilla fun fact: Don’t toss a handful into your mouth.
I wanna be in that relationship were I can just do the stupidest shit. Like legit, dance in public with me, make faces at me, do accents with me, hell, make fun of my bad habits in a funny way. I don’t care, just have fun with me.